When I first stepped into the realm of adulthood (when I first got a real job) back in 2012 at a wonderful structural firm called Magnusson Klemencic Associates in Seattle, the first task I was assigned to design was a chimney for some rich dude’s mansion somewhere in the middle of Idaho.
I know. Exciting stuff, right?
But you gotta start somewhere, and that was the beginning of my relationship with the world of structural engineering. And I was involved in many different projects of varying degrees of such excitement as I started my career, including the University of Iowa School of Music and The Dhirubhai Ambani International Convention and Exhibition Centre - I know, it’s a mouthful - but here’s the kicker: you have seen as much of the buildings as I have if you just clicked the links above. I’ve never seen those buildings go up in real life. I’ve never even seen a photo of that chimney that I designed when I first started work.
Your career to me is like any other relationship. In your youth, relationships are but dreams. You have a crush on that cute girl who sits across from you in your 2nd period Social Studies class (I made that up so don’t bother putting on your internet detective hats) just like you wonder how awesome it would be to Be Like Mike and play in the NBA for a living.
But eventually we figure out what we want to do or who we want to be with (some would argue that we all decide these things too early in our lives but that’s a discussion for another day) and we step into a relationship with - in my case, structural engineering.
We don’t all get to love what we do everyday we do it. Sure, some people are lucky and get to wake up everyday sure of themselves and are passionate in everything they do, but the reality is, sometimes we have doubts about who we’re with. Sometimes we’re not sure that we’re on the right path. Whether the issue is money or sanity, the grass does really seem greener on the other side every now and then. And in those moments we need something to kick us in the rear end and keep us going. Something to remind us why we do what we do, to keep us motivated. And it’s different for everyone - sometimes what drives you is watching yourself get passed over by people you know you’re better than (love you Nerlens!). For some people, the faces of gratitude on the patient that they just saved from the brink of death is what keeps them going. Everyone has their own muse.
My muse is SF MoMA. Well, the SF MoMA expansion.
I worked on SF MoMA starting back in 2013. I designed the gravity system for the building; that is, I designed the steel beams and columns that hold the building up, but I did not contribute to anything that might help you in the event of an earthquake (that’s called the lateral system). I won’t bore you with specifics of the building design process but anyway, during the construction of the building I was switched onto a new team and I never got to see the building up close and personal…
… until last winter, when I visited San Francisco with my family! I dragged them halfway across the city just so I could catch a glimpse of my pride and joy. My parents watched me in amusement seeing their 25-year-old son jump around excitedly like he was six and pointing giddily at a half finished skeleton of a building half hidden by the buildings surrounding it (let’s say our view from the street was limited at best). But it was more than just an incomplete museum expansion to me. I looked up at the pearly walls and I could say the three words that I’d always dreamed of saying.
“I did that.”
Like, holy shit, I did that.
I mean I’m not going to take all the credit. Hundreds of other people had their fingerprints all over the building. A lot of people probably had more of an impact on this building than I did. And hell, most people will never actually see much of my contributions - almost everything I designed is hidden behind walls and beneath the floors. But being able to see my work in real life, not on a computer screen and not on a piece of paper, validates to me why I do what I do. It makes the long hours and the complicated design challenges worth it. It makes me feel better about the path I’m on and where it will take me.
Sometimes all it takes is just to see her face to remind ourselves what made us fall in love with her in the first place.